Bert felt jealous, cheated on, and blue. Then he discovered he could morph into a giant nightmarish slug... Would you like a FREE copy? On Wednesdays and Sundays I’m blogging nibble-sized chunks of new ‘Life in the Clouds’ novellas. You can check in regularly and read them bit for bit, or leave a message in my 'contact' page, and I'll send the entire digital story to you for free when published. Life in the Clouds #6: Take a Slug ® James Field. |
Dear friends, if you like a good chuckle, dim-witted heroes, and larger-than-life villains, then you'll love this fascinating series. On Wednesdays and Sundays, I’m blogging nibble-sized chunks of new ‘Life in the Clouds’ stories. You can check in regularly and read them for free, or wait to buy the entire story when published.
#2: Enchanter on the Roof ® James Field. Part 42 In the last post: Bert tore at the scaffolding. When the handcuff keys bounced off his head, his anger vanished… Bert placed his foot over the handcuff keys and whistled a tuneless ditty. He stole a peek in all directions. Nobody hung about. The morning sun still hadn't lifted above the house roofs and many of The Stable’s guests snored in bed. Most of the youngsters had been at the disco last night, partying until the early hours. His frustration mounted again, causing his brow to flush. The disco and Dick Charmer had triggered the start of all his troubles. Until now, luck had been in Dick Charmer's favour, but that was about to change. A few workers stalked about, tending farm animals and readying the numerous majestic horses for the day’s work, but they were busy elsewhere, mostly out of sight. He kicked the keys to where he could reach them and bent to pick them up. He wasn't as nimble-fingered as Dick Charmer, but thirty seconds later he had both hands free. Desperate to relieve himself, and scarcely able to walk with his knees clamped together, he hurtled through his house and made straight for the outside toilet at the back. His two black Alsatians followed him out and awaited their orders, panting with excitement. He'd left the door open, his bulk filling the whole cubical. “Ready for a chase, Chums?” he called over his shoulder. The dogs tensed and woofed an eager yes. Bert led them to Dick Charmer’s house at the other end of the terrace, entered, and found the pile of clothes he’d been wearing. He let the Alsatians sniff them and snapped his arms out, pointing the direction Dick Charmer had taken. “Find him, Chums. I know you ain't had breakfast yet, nor have I, but don’t kill and eat him until I get there. Go!” To be continued… The real world: Rather than miss an instalment, it’s easy to follow my blog on bloglovin’. They’ll give you a friendly nudge as I release new parts. Like to know more about Alf, Bert and the rest of the gang? You can read their chaotic history in What on Earth. -
The picture is taken by Mathias Westermann from Pixabay
0 Comments
Dear friends, if you like a good chuckle, dim-witted heroes, and larger-than-life villains, then you'll love this fascinating series. On Wednesdays and Sundays, I’m blogging nibble-sized chunks of new ‘Life in the Clouds’ stories. You can check in regularly and read them for free, or wait to buy the entire story when published.
Enchanter on the Roof ® James Field. Part 41 In the last post: Dick Charmer ran off with the stolen goods, bragging he was the greatest… As Dick Charmer hopped over a fence, scurried into a copse of dense trees, and disappeared, Bert’s muscles turned rigid. This was so damn unfair, he reasoned. There he remained, handcuffed to a scaffolding pole, relatively innocent, while that pickpocket, trickster, and womaniser had planted incriminating evidence on him, escaped, and left him to face Chief Inspector Dobbs's wrath. Like a volcano eruption on the brink, pressure built deep within Bert's barrel chest, filling his gigantic body with a force that demanded release. His Alsatians, still shut inside his house, must have sensed his anger and frustration because they howled. With the strength of a grizzly bear, Bert grasped his restraining scaffolding pole and gave it an almighty shake. All along the terrace house, the stiff metal framework of poles and planks shook and rattled fit to collapse. But despite his Herculean effort, the structure refused to do more than clatter like a jostled skeleton of bones. He tensed himself for a surge of energy that would at least lift his pole high enough from the ground for him to slip the handcuff's chain from under. Just then, something small, light and hard stung him on his bald head and bounced to the grass by his feet. He blinked twice. When his mind twigged what his eyes begged him to recognize, his anger drained away faster than air escaping from a burst balloon. His tantrum had shaken the handcuff keys from the scaffolding boards above, and now they rested within reach, winking at him in the morning sun. To be continued… The real world: Rather than miss an instalment, it’s easy to follow my blog on bloglovin’. They’ll give you a friendly nudge as I release new parts. Like to know more about Alf, Bert and the rest of the gang? You can read their chaotic history in What on Earth. -
Bildet er tatt av Clker-Free-Vector-Images fra Pixabay
Life in the Clouds. Charismatic stories.
Dear friends, if you like a good chuckle, dim-witted heroes, and larger-than-life villains, then you'll love this fascinating series. On Wednesdays and Sundays, I’m blogging nibble-sized chunks of new ‘Life in the Clouds’ stories. You can check in regularly and read them for free, or wait to buy the entire story when published.
Enchanter on the Roof ® James Field. Part 40 Dick Charmer appeared from his house after five minutes, and Bert had to look twice before he recognised him. The young scoundrel had shaved his head bald and wore a checkered shirt and dungarees: a typical farmhand. “You’re not going to snitch on me, are you?” said Dick Charmer. He spoke with a Polish accent now and prodded a couple of acne spots that weren’t there before. “Caw, blimey!” Forgetting Chief Inspector Dobbs had handcuffed him to a scaffolding pole, Bert absent-mindedly tried to scratch his arse. When that didn't work, he clawed his head instead. The little bunch of handcuff keys magically appeared in Dick Charmer’s hand. He dangled them in front of Bert’s nose. “Want them?” “Course I do,” said Bert, reaching for them. “Shame.” Dick Charmer tossed the keys up onto the scaffolding boards above their heads. "I'm glad I'm not in your shoes when Dobby the Bobby gets back. He'll go bananas when he sees I'm gone." As Bert gazed longingly upwards, he felt something slide over his head and drop around his neck. “It’s a gift,” said Dick Charmer. “A gold necklace with a locket. And inside the locket is a picture of some hunky guy.” He chuckled, dropped his pouch of stolen jewellery into his small battered suitcase, and snapped the lid closed. “Dobby the Bobby won’t be in such a hurry to chase after me while you’re explaining where that little trinket came from. Bye-bye, and when you’re sitting in the clink, don’t forget to spread the news of the great ‘Four-P’.” To be continued… The real world: Rather than miss an instalment, it’s easy to follow my blog on bloglovin’. They’ll give you a friendly nudge as I release new parts. Like to know more about Alf, Bert and the rest of the gang? You can read their chaotic history in What on Earth. -
Bildet er tatt av Esther Chilcutt fra Pixabay
|
James Field
Talvik, Norway You can also Find me on subscribe to get a free copy
The Thursday Murder Club by Richard Osman
My rating: 2 of 5 stars There’s a lot to like and a lot to dislike in this story. I like that it’s cosy, funny, and heart-warming. The plot, however, is a tragedy. There are two murders, and every character in the book, of which there are many, has a motif. With so many twists, turns, and red herrings throughout the narrative, it lost me in a virtual maze. But the author commits the gravest crime: he introduces a new, guilty character right at the end of the story. Tut, tut, naughty. View all my reviews Archives
March 2024
|